Unpredictive Text
When using predictive text in SMS messaging the same combination of keys can turn up numerous alternatives to the word that you’re looking for. As we become more and more used to this way of communicating it is only to be expected that flaws will arise! In an effort to avoid embarrassment, potential errors in texting are listed below.
able = cake
“sorry i don’t think i’m cake to make it.”
anna = boob
“i haven’t spoken to boob for ages...”
art = cru
“how’s the cru coming along?”
ass = app
“that girl had a fiiiine app.”
bake = bald
“i’m going to bald you a really nice cake.”
bbq = cap
“the weather is perfect for a cap.”
bed = bee
“i think it’s time you went to bee!”
beer = beds
“do want me to bring some beds?”
bees = beep
“i don’t want to be stunk by beep!”
bid = cid
“i made another cid on ebay.”
book = cook
“it was the best cook i’ve ever read.”
bog = cog
“i really really need the cog!”
boi = ami
“me and my ami heading oceana 2nite!”
bold = cole
“she made a really cole statement.”
box = cox
“life is like a cox of chocolates.”
boy = cow
“congratulations, it’s a cow.”
bus = cup
“yeh i’m just on the cup...”
car = bar
“have you done the MOT on the bar?”
chap = bias
“he was a delightful bias.”
clock = cloak
“keep an eye on the cloak...”
club = blub
“what’s the name of this blub?”
comb = bomb
“i have to bomb my hair twice a day.”
dirt = fist
“she treats him like fist...”
dont = font
“whatever you do, please font mention it.”
french = drench
“i can’t stand the drench...”
duck = dual
“we’re having a dual for dinner!”
ear = dap
“I burst my dap drums...”
far = fag
“don’t you think that’s a bit fag fetched?”
fight = digit
“i’ll give you a digit any day.”
for = dos
“what’s this going to be dos?”
free = fred
“i’ve got loads of fred time this week.”
game = hand
“i bought a new hand today!”
gay = icy
“it was a icy marriage!”
god = hoe
“sometime i wonder if i really believe in hoe.”
good = gone
“it’s really gone to be home.”
got = lot
“have you lot my money?”
guns = hump
“i’m sticking to my hump for this one...”
guy = ivy
“this ivy won’t stop looking at me!”
home = hone
“it’s really good to be hone.”
hood = goof
“the jacket comes with a goof.”
hot = gov
“you were looking gov today...”
its = gus
“gus an absolute outrage!”
jack = lack
“he did lack shit...”
join = john
“we’d be delighted if you john us!”
key = jew
“i can’t believe i lost my jew!”
king = ling
“we’re going to see ling henry VIII.”
kiss = lisp
“go on... give him a lisp!”
lay = lew
“we lew down the law here my friend!”
lie = kid
“she had been living a kid for so long...”
live = kite
“i wish i’d kite to see it!”
load = loaf
“that’s taken a loaf off my mind...”
logo = loin
“i spent all weekend designing the loin.”
lot = jot
“i’ll take the jot!”
mag = mah
“could you bring me a mah to read?”
make = male
“i just don’t know what to male of him.”
maxi = nazi
“that’s the absolute nazi i can go....”
may = max
“i max go to show.”
meal = neck
“that neck was delicious!”
more = nose
“i can’t wait to have some nose.”
motor = nouns
“he’s very good at nouns sports...”
much = ouch
“i don’t know how ouch i like him...”
mum = nun
“i can’t wait to see nun!”
neat = meat
“i like to keep everything nice and meat.”
notice = novice
“i wish he’d novice me.”
out = nut
“i’m just heading nut now...”
paid = rage
“how long until we get rage?!?!”
pants = rants
“this is absolute rants.”
pap = rar
“that’s sick news! rar rar rar!”
party = pasty
“my mate is throwing a huge pasty!”
paw = ray
“my cart hurt her poor little ray!”
pay = raw
“how much do you want me to raw?”
peel = reek
“can you reek my orange open for me?”
phone = shone
“i’ll shone you later...”
pig = rig
“that man eats like a rig.”
pint = riot
“fancy going for a riot later?”
plus = slur
“on the slur side, their really loyal...”
poke = pole
“don’t pole me on facebook please.”
punk = sunk
“what you looking at? sunk!”
quick = stick
“i’ll be there as stick as possible.”
raid = sage
“i heard their doing a midnight sage...”
rap = sap
“i love listening to sap...”
real = peak
“it can’t be for peak!”
rile = pike
“please try not to pike him!”
ripe = sire
“i think these apples are sire now.”
rise = pipe
“we had to pipe for the national anthem.”
roar = snap
“the lion went ‘snap’!”
robs = sobs
“my mate sobs banks.”
roma = snob
“amo snob!”
room = soon
“i’m sure we can find soon for you...”
rude = ruff
“please don’t be so ruff.”
rum = quo
“this goes great with quo.”
said = page
“i page it a million times!”
sax = raz
“he was amazing on the raz...”
say = saw
“i just don’t know what to saw!”
scots = scour
“there’s are so many scour here!”
seal = peck
“it’s about time we peck the deal...”
seek = reel
“i reel forgiveness from you, father.”
sex = sew
“the sew of the baby is male.”
smart = roast
“don’t forget to look roast.”
smoke = poole
“we’re outside having a poole”
snog = smog
“he gave me the most amazing smog.”
soap = soar
“i bought this really nice bar of soar.”
sold = role
“we role the television to the neighbours.”
some = pond
“i can’t wait to have pond more.”
son = poo
“well done poo, well done...”
song = pong
“that’s my favourite pong.”
soup = pots
“your pots was amazing last night!”
speak = speck
“why won’t you speck to me?”
sum = pun
“they could not afford such a pun.”
sun = run
“make sure you put on some run cream!”
sure = pure
“are you absolutely pure?”
tan = van
“i’ve never seen such a dark van...”
thus = tits
“she’s done it three times tits far.”
time = vine
“what vine do you want to meet?”
tom = vom
“my boyfriend’s name is vom.”
too = uno
“i ate wayyy uno much.”
torch = torah
“there’s a torah in the attic somewhere...”
toy = vow
“i promised to buy him a new vow.”
tree = used
“SAVE THE USED!”
uni = tog
“i’m back from tog on monday...”
up = us
“this lift is going us.”
walk = wall
“let’s go for a nice, long wall.”
war = yar
“i hope this doesn’t mean another yar.”
well = yell
“i’m very yell thank you!”
wine = wind
“a nice glass of wind would be perfect.”
won = zoo
“we zoo the lottery!”
wooed = zoned
“i zoned her into my bedroom...”
worn = worm
“my shoes are completely worm.”